With the sad heartbreaking news of the death of actor Robin Williams there have been lots of conversations in the last few days on our radio stations, TV stations and on social media about depression and mental illness in general. I firmly believe that as a community we need to be talking about these issues more often. I think we are not so good at helping people who face or deal with mental illness…there is often a rush to help when someone has just found out they have cancer or they have had a heart attack, but dear me you've just been diagnosed with bipolar disorder or depression or anxiety… we can’t help you or maybe it's just that we don't know how to help you, so we aren't going to do or say anything.
There have been any number of things that have happened in the last 2 years that have caused me to struggle with anxiety. It’s been hard. I have been angry. I have been sad. I have been overwhelmed. I have been depressed. I have been anxious. So take a little walk with me for a second because #thisistheface ...
I struggled a great deal with the Lord during a particular season of my life where I couldn't make sense of the feelings I was having. I couldn't understand how as a follower of Jesus I could keep trying to choose joy, but it felt like, at times, joy wasn't choosing me. And then one afternoon I was reading through Psalms and landed on Psalms 23.
“Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.”
And then it was as if the Lord hit me upside the head with a spiritual 2x4… I was going about this all the wrong way. I was trying to choose something that wasn't even a choice at that moment. Did you catch it? I made it bold because I didn't want you to miss my 2x4! "Even though I walk through..." Absolutely brilliant!
Never once did I hear the Lord say to me “choose joy, happiness, sunshine or rainbows”... He only ever asked me to choose Him. In the valley the Lord is my choice. And then slowly He picked me up and set me on my feet and then He began asking me to do something a little harder... He asked me to WALK THROUGH. To leave the place I was. To move forward. Which is not to undermine what I was dealing with, but I couldn't pitch my tent in the valley of anxiousness. I couldn't stay there. So that’s what I did; I started walking through the valley. I don't know what your valley is and sometimes the valleys may come for a day, a month or even years. When you're in the midst of something like this you may feel like there is no choice. I felt for time I didn't have any choices in the matter this was just the way it was, but then my 2x4 and I discovered that my choice, my only choice, is to walk through. Here me when I say this... it wasn't like I read a scripture and then jumped right up and sprinted out of that valley. No friends, there were days in the darkest of this valley that I could only muster one step, one tiny step, but the Lord met me with unwavering kindness.
If I just committed to walking through the valley a little each day He eventually picked up my pace and He carried me out. I was in counseling for several months and my counselor actually started asking me “how many steps did you take today” and it became this beautiful reminder that the Lord doesn't care if I have a smile plastered to my face or tears staining my cheeks it only matters that I choose Him.
Today was anxiety free, but things could change in an instant. I have equipped myself with education and a good therapist. So now I know if things start to feel more out of control than is necessary (hey I have 2 small children and never ending laundry there are areas of life that can be a little reckless) I can ask for help. I know where to turn for help.
So I am standing with my friend, Cory Dahlkamp, in the #thisistheface campaign because I think it's important that as a community we talk about these things. We must talk about mental illness. We must be open and honest and loving. We may even have people in our lives at work, school, church or right next door that need a hand to hold while they're walking through. We need to make sure people know that it's ok. You're not alone in any of this.
It is never an easy place that God puts us in when He asks us to reveal the most vulnerable parts of us to the world, but I would encourage you to be brave and stand with me!
As many of you know I love a good song... and you also know I love the band Carrollton and they released the official lyric video of their new song Holding On To You today. Ya'll this happened today, TODAY, as all of this stuff is bubbling up in my soul they release this video, today... care to guess what it is about? Coincidence? I think not -- God is shaking things up.
Because even in the darkest valleys we walk through the sun is gonna rise once again.
